Today, we’re gonna have some real talk. Talk about priorities, goals, and perspective. We are also going to talk about treats, spoils, and little life luxuries. Unless your financial situation equals endless flow of cash (ours is not), it can be difficult to have it all, whenever you want it without thinking twice. And, that’s ok. And normal. But, if you have ever found yourself judging someone for the money they spend on things (that may no be important to you or sound frivolous to you), or felt like you are being judged (admittedly, I have been both), I’m going to offer up a different way to look at things.
We all seek happiness and find bits of joy in different places. Identify what is most important to you… what you prioritize. I’m not talking the first tier- family, faith, charity, etc.; I’m talking about what makes you excited? How do you envision your perfect Saturday? That kind of happiness. The “extra”. Is it important to you to have a pristine appearance, fresh from the spa on a regular basis? Or do you prefer to invest in travel? Or maybe spending nights out with friends make you the happiest. For me, it’s finding ways to make my home into the place I love most. (I imagine I’m not alone here 😉 ). Or, maybe you look at the picture of your life and think “I would be doing well just to pick up something that isn’t totally necessary at the grocery store”. Even though we all have varying responsibilities, home life, and finances, each of us can identify a goal and go after it.
I have friends that can buy whatever they want, I have friends that have difficulty paying their bills. I have friends who go out to eat every night, friends that have traveled the world, and friends who are happiest fulfilling their role as a mom. We all have different priorities. It doesn’t make any one person more right; it’s about each person spending life in a way that brings them joy.
Now, I am not a financial adviser but I’m going to share a way to look at the big picture – the way I look at the big picture. It isn’t earth shattering but it’s practical. If you are like me and place value in having some help around the house, bringing in some comfort, and having a bit of a change in scenery occasionally, it is likely achievable. It’s a total myth that you have to be rich to have a house keeper. Fresh blooms are not a waste if they make you happy. Nice bed linens are an investment and switching up throw pillows doesn’t just have to be for people whose homes are on camera. Maybe you can have it all… maybe you can’t. But if you can’t, it doesn’t mean you can’t afford the luxuries you want. It just means you have to make some choices and sacrifice. Here’s how it works in our family. I used to get a mani-pedi every two weeks and get my hair done more often. Working from home has changed how I prioritize my wardrobe. I am good with keeping Starbucks to special occasions and using my Costco brand k-cups in my Keurig. We don’t take big vacations and we eat at home 95% of the time. I am fine with all of this. Actually, I am great with all of this because some are the the decisions we made and acclimated to as a result of wanting to treat our home and treat ourselves at home. Achieving what we place the most value on.
Think about the small things in life- any frequent habits? They add up. Do you purchase individual bottles of water from a convenient store on a regular basis? Do you eat out for lunch? Choose something you want that you can’t justify or allocate funds to. Then, consider small things you do without thinking twice. Or, think of things a little differently. Regular movie date go-er? Switching to home movie dates (with all the fixin’s) is a HUGE money saver. Four trips could justify hydrangeas for months! Here’s a few examples.
If eating out for dinner makes you happy – if that is your source of joy – then that is what you should do. If it has become habit and is hindering you from saving a little to delierately put toward something that would bring you more joy, then seek alternatives.
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Here’s the bottom line. Don’t compare yourself to others who do/have things you don’t. Their choices and priorities are unique to them. The next time you find yourself saying “I wish I could do xyz like her, consider if it is something you truly want or if you are caught up in the natural comparison game. If it is truly something you want, then make a plan to go after it. If not, think of all you have/do that you are happy to have over the things you don’t.
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I would love to hear about some of your favorite little luxuries and where you find bits of joy! You can drop a note in the comment section below.
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LOVE this post! How true it is! Thank you for sharing.
Bethany thank you so much for taking the time to stop by! I’m glad you can relate!
Yes, gratitude is the key! Love this and you! xoxo
Jen, so true! Love you!
Love this! I love decorating our home and changing out decor with the seasons or holidays.
Lisa, thank you for sharing! I’m with you 😉
This is a wonderful post!! I love that your put it into perspective that everyone has their vices, wants, needs and desires. It is all truly about the “choices” we make in our lives. Those simply differences between people is truly what makes us all unique, and we have to appreciate those differences in others.
Jen, so true! You and I- we are two peas in a pod 😉
Awesome tips and perspective Kel!! LOVED this post!!!
Tam, thank you so much sweet friend! xoxo
Buy water bottles? No way! Invest in a CORKSICLE & refill daily. DD or Starbucks daily? 👎 Make at home percolator coffee is the best. These savings = fresh flowers weekly in my home. Love your way of thinking Kelly! Thanks for sharing
Roseann, I don’t know what a corksicle is but I like it! haha. Amen- I am trying to stop going through our plastic bottles and instead refill from the fridge.
Great post. So true, we all have to make choices and sometimes be patient and save.
Marty, thank you so much for taking the time to stop by! xo
Great post! We recently did a whole reno to your house. While being out of the house for 8 months and living with my MIL I am fine with being home all the time. Now with our first baby on the way we are trying to get our credit card debt (from the reno) down before the baby comes. I can’t tell you the last time I bought something other than food was.
Maryann, that is amazing you are staying diligent in meeting your goal! I hope you treat yourself when you reach that- what an awesome day that will be. And, congratulations on your baby!
Fresh flowers weekly in my home is a must. I cut out my frequent visits to Starbucks! Good post!
Tonia, that is awesome! I am the same way- give me the k-cup so I can have the blooms with no guilt! 😉
I love throw pillows…but I also love the savings I get by sewing my own! So easy and SO much less expensive then in store pillows.
Ann, I so wish I knew how to sew! That is a wonderful way to get those beauties!
I couldn’t agree more! One of the treats I have in place of Starbucks is a nice candle burning in the evenings home with my husband. We work in different cities so our time and nest deserves the extra treat!
Kimberly, I LOVE that! I treat myself by burning the nice candles on the weekends 🙂
Yes! I’ve never agreed more with an entire post. I have a similar one on the calendar because I think it is SO important to prioritize what YOU want to spulrge on and stop comparing yourself to people with different priorities.
Melissa, we must be soul sisters! We should not apologize for indulging in the things that are important to us. xoxo
Great post Kelley Nan. I also choose to spend more money on our home than any other aspect of our lives. No regrets at all. Home is where our family spends time and builds memories. Home makes me happy.
Denise, I am right there with you. Wishing you a beautiful day!
This IS a great post and one upon which you could build a lecture or group conversation.
It is a win-win! It focuses a person mind on doing something pretty and creative rather than moping.
It is empowering. I purchase flowers as they fill my heart as does my daughter. She says they are something her husband gives her each week. (he does not and as great as he is as a father, son-in-law, and Dad – he is not the most outwardly affectionate guy) making her concept of ‘the flowers’ brilliant.
I could list more but this is sufficient. Kellly Nan, you have so many varied and great gifts to share with others. So glad I found your blog. Bravo!
Lyn, thank you so much for taking the time to visit with me and thank you for sharing! I don’t know what I would do without some fresh flowers to look at 😉
And don’t forget count your blessings ! Too many times we forget what we do have and I don’t mean material things. Love your blog Kelly Nan
Kim, you are exactly right. <3
Priorities. Big word that truly says it all. And who sets them? We do. Love that feeling of power and knowing it is working for our family. AND it is ok that they change….keeps life exciting, just the way it should be.
Patty, you are exactly right! Thank you so much for visiting with me today and sharing!
love this post!
Lauren, thank you!
Love, love all your posts tips. Thank You for sharing your house with us. I also purchase fresh flowers every week. Fresh flowers make me happy😃
Marlene, that is wonderful! Thank you for taking the time to visit with me today!
I love this post Kelly ❤, I use to splurge on designer shoes, handbag and clothes and fine dinning once a week, nail appt every 2 weeks, massage once a month and my lashes extension and travel once a month and going out with my friends, let’s just say I spend a lot money on myself. But all of that have changed since Dec 2015 when my BF and I decided to purchase a home together and after that everything changed, all I care about is making my home comfortable because now we love staying home and doing things around the house to make our home a relaxing place for the both of us and our 2 dogs and we both are totally fine with that! I get really excited when people come to my house and told me that they’re too afraid to touch anything because it look like a perfect zgallerie show room lol #nailit! Because that’s exactly what I was going for. I also enjoy decorating my house by season since I become a home owner over a year ago I since collect soooooo much seasonal decor, my bf had to built a shed outside for extra storage I just can’t help it, on my free time I enjoy going to home goods, Marshall and TJ max and Ross for their home decor stuff that’s my happiness now, I seriously don’t need anything for my house anymore because everything I want I pretty much purchase already so I like looking for ideas and new things to buy to make my house better through your blog and instagram post! So thank you Kelly for sharing ur beautiful home with us because you are so inspiring! I currently live in Colorado but if we ever move the south we would totally built a home just like yours, your home is my dream home it’s just perfect, I show my bf a picture of your home and he totally agree with me! Lol I’m still at that awkward age where I’m deciding what makes me happy in life and how I want to live my life but honestly when I’m on social media now and I see my friends going out having fun getting wasted and traveling I no longer envy or desire that life like I use to and feel like I need to do what they do in order to be cool!,but when I feel like I’m getting old and boring because I stayed home all the time, I usually will go out and enjoy myself but not often anymore because now I’m seriously tired and I completely happy and content sitting on my couch watching Netflix with my wine and snacks and my cashmere throw blanket.
Jenny, I absolutely loved reading about you this morning! It is a journey and we are constantly evolving. I think we are probably cut from the same cloth 😉
Love this post as I have been feeling guilty of late since I have started redecorating my house. In my defense though, it’s been 22 years since we built it and did any decorating, painting, etc. because we were too busy raising three girls. With our last one off to college, I found myself wanting a change and my “nesting” instinct kicked in. I spend most of my time at home, work, or church and we don’t go out very often. With my latest kitchen, living room, and dining room remodel, I had to remind myself that I didn’t spend any more than most people do on a new car and because I drive a car that is 10 years old that it was okay to make my home more pleasing and comfortable. The trade-off is worth it because I spend very little time in my car as I live seven minutes from where I work. I love fresh flowers, too, and used to feel guilty about buying them, but don’t anymore. They make me happy! I so enjoy your blog and your home is beautiful! Thanks for taking the time to share.
Leigh, I am so glad you are allowing your nesting mode! And, that is a fantastic way to think of it; good for you! I would take a kitchen reno over a car any day, too 😉
What a beautiful home & such an insightful person… So glad I found your blog… I am about to move & plan to use alot of your awesome ideas… May I just add.. Loving your home & being a homebody doesn’t make you old… IT SAYS YOU ARE VERY CONTENT IN YOUR NEST!!!Neil Diamond ET movie… ” HOME is the most excellent place to be “…. AND IT IS!!!! Thanks for your awesome blog… I prowl it over & over… Really love it!!!!!Thanks so much with sharing with us all your great ideas & thoughts! Thanks!:)
Debbie, this absolutely made my day. Thank you so much for taking the time to leave me a note – so happy to have you here and I agree, I love being content in my nest <3